 
					
							kisses_of_vodka
							Member Since October 19, 2009
						
													
											
	
	
	
		Amateur Glamour Model
	
	
		by 
					 Jolly1
	
	
		 5631 days ago
				Jolly1
	
	
		 5631 days ago
	
	
		
			
									 kisses_of_vodka
			
			
				 5856 days ago
								kisses_of_vodka
			
			
				 5856 days ago
			
		
		
											 Jolly1
	
	
		 5631 days ago
				Jolly1
	
	
		 5631 days ago
	
	 kisses_of_vodka
			
			
				 5856 days ago
								kisses_of_vodka
			
			
				 5856 days ago
			
		
													  
						-  
						4 
						 + 
					
										
				It was an alright story, but very hard to read. You had such an amazing cast of characters to deal with, but you failed to develop them. It turned into an unrealistic fantasy because you didn't work with the details, and use proper grammatical structure.
				
		
	